Who Am I?

"Who Am I?" is the question I ask myself as I enter this unfamiliar journey in Graduate School. Hopefully, upon graduating I will be able to define who I am. For now though, I'll provide a little insight about myself and who I hope to become.

After I completed my undergraduate degree in 2007, I had absolutely no intention of seeking a master's degree. Actually,when several people asked , I responded matter-of-factly that continuing college was something I DID NOT want to do. Well, I was proved wrong.

I noticed that something was missing, something I just couldn't describe. I'm not sure exactly what moment triggered these feelings, but there was a definite time in which I began to consider the idea of returning to school. Perhaps I was more comfortable with an absolutely full schedule, and the down-time received after graduation just wasn't me. Or maybe I missed learning new things day to day, and needed that stimulation once again. I believe it was the need to contiuously push myself beyond what I think my limits are. Proving to myself that I have the ability to do things I don't think I can do is the actual reason I am here.

Fear began to sink in as I began my first graduate class. Hearing the intellectual thoughts and opinions of others in class discouraged me. During those first days, I began to reconsider the idea of returning to school. The first few assignments boosted and maintained my stress levels. An internal battle began. Would I quit because I didn't believe in myself? Or would I continue because I did believe in myself? This question stayed in my mind during the second week of class. But then I began to learn new things I had never learned before. The assignments became an oppurtunity to reflect my newly discovered knowledge, not just an assignment for a passing grade. By the end of the class I had answered the question: I had to keep going. I do believe in myself.

So here I am. I am continuing this jouney, and I know the ride will not be an absolutely smooth one. There will be obstacles in the form of my own fears and others doubts, but I plan to stay diligent in discovering who I am.